Round 2

I went in for my second hip surgery, and this time it went better, slightly. I still stopped breathing for a bit, but they quickly put my lungs back to work and shipped me out to the ICU, hooray. A few notable things about this surgery: holy hell it hurts when they don't give you pain medication. I was given nothing before, nothing during, a little bit after, and then narcan, and then swearing. A whole lot of swearing, I mean I really let loose. I guess my body doesn't like the combination of anesthesia and injected narcotics. Next time I go in I'm pretty sure they'll only give me a shot of whiskey and a leather band to bite on. This pain was a 10. I think when they moved me I cried and begged them not to. It would have been very nice to have blacked out, but I didn't until we got to the hospital. I told the EMT's in the ambulance that I was going to throw up, so they held a little spittle cup in front of my mouth. After getting rid of about a gallon of fluid in my stomach they upgraded to the bowl. Fortunately I wasn't in the ICU for more than a day. It was my goal to get out of there ASAP. My doctor also told my mother that my hips were the worst he's seen. When I'm good at something I'm damn good at it.

The moral of the story: don't have my genes.